Who knew that, after marriage, I would disappear? No seriously, I am not a magician but somehow I can no longer see myself! Quick true story about me and probably 60 percent of all the women I know.
Finished my masters, met my husband, got married, bought a house, worked, got pregnant, became a PTA mom, started having all sorts of colds, body pains, sleep deprivation and started questioning is this really what I thought my life would be like?
Than I stopped, paused and thought about who was I before I got married? What did I love? What made me most happy? Do you remember? I did. I basked in my moment, and felt that happiness I once felt.
So why did everything change? It's normal for life to change after marriage and its normal for us to change and grow as individuals, but it is not okay for us to disappear because of all the changes.
As we evolve from being daughter to wife to mother, our image of ourselves can start to blur and as a result we no longer feel in control of our lives. Once control is lost, goals, desires, motivators all start unraveling and you are left feeling unhappy, depressed and deflated. These feelings then result in a negative self image; whether it is feeling overweight, underweight, nit picking at wrinkles or simply just not feeling happy about who you have become.
The key is taking the reigns of your life and harnessing control again. It is easy to become complacent and do nothing but it is essential to reinvent yourself now.
Steps to start reinventing yourself now:
1. Every day is a new day. Wake up every morning feeling like today I am going to do what really matters to me. Nothing can stop me, nothing is going to get in the way of reaching my day's goals. Waking up to a cranky child, the alarm clock not going off, kids can't find their homework. It's okay, take a moment think am I going to let this affect the start of my day? Now think how can this be resolved? Think positive, be patient, think before you react. This could make all the difference in how productive your days ends up being. The more satisfied you are with your morning the more likely you are to stay on track to eating right and staying active all day. Having a bad morning could mean grabbing something to eat that gives you instant gratification and an instant reason not to work out.
2. Be prepared. I don't know one mother who isn't physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted but somehow we still make it through the day. Being prepared for the day can make life a little less hectic, give us our moments to breathe and make life's little surprises more bearable. It is already so difficult to eat a balanced diet and stay active to maintain a healthy lifestyle, but when you throw in lack of time, a hectic work schedule or home schedule, volunteering at our children's schools, driving to practices, helping with homework, spending quality time with the kids/spouse, it makes it nearly impossible. Some tips to prepare for every day:
• No dirty dishes policy. All dishes should be immediately washed or loaded into the dishwasher. Uncluttered counter space = Uncluttered mind