I don’t know about you, but after reading Karen R.’s awesome post Monday about her plans to participate in a marathon relay, I am feeling like I totally need to get off my own butt and do something. But I am motivated by other people that way. Their success inspires me.

I am also motivated, some days, by chocolate. Also sleep. (Yes, I am a slug. With chocolate-breath.)

So I was thinking this morning about motivation. It comes in different packages for different people. Some of us are totally competitive, some are into Inner Growth and Finding One’s Peace and all. And some of us (okay, me) find ourselves bouncing around, trying out different ways of finding motivation, a drive to Do Something.

Sometimes there’s a carrot there up ahead (a chocolate carrot), and sometimes there’s a damned stick behind me.

Both seem to work. But is one better than another?

I’m thinking here about my kids. Raise a hand if you have never offered a bribe of any sort to your kids.

I don’t see any hands. Huh.

Although I thought I would never stoop to bribery, there it is plain as day, staring me in the face. Sometimes the bribes are implied (After dinner we will all watch a movie! So eat your dinner!) and sometimes they’re more overt (Let Mommy work now and then we will play a game) or really overt (Watch your brother for an hour while I work and I will PAY you! Real money!).

[Yes, I have said all those things.]

But hello, they work! Carrots feel good!

But sticks work too, especially those self-applied sticks. And although they get the job done, they don’t feel as nice.

The very best way to find motivation is to first find what you love. This sounds easy but it’s not that simple. First you have to allow yourself to love something, to deserve something in your life that makes you truly happy. Some of us have trouble with this; for years I struggled with the whole self-worth thing and thought I didn’t really quite deserve to have what I wanted. So I put all that away, focused on what everyone around me wanted, and quietly seethed inside because a part of me knew I was denying myself on purpose yet I felt powerless to stop it.

And finding what you love is like finding yourself. Once you let all the parts of you come out, it’s much easier to say what you want. I LOVE what I do for a living. I love connecting with people and helping them find their inner selves. It’s absolutely beautiful seeing the changes that take place in people, seeing how they work to resolve old hurts and find more of their trueness inside. And in doing what I do, I am also feeling true to who I am. So all that is a huge motivator for me, but it took a long time to find it, lots of inner work and soul searching.

But all that sounds like a lot of work. And it is, sort of a lifelong sort of work. And in between we can still find our little carrots (chocolate ones, thank you, or inspiring ones like Karen R.’s treadmill action) and wield those self-inflicted sticks from time to time.

What motivates you?