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I’ve been watching my younger son for the past hour and it dawned on me just how brilliant he is. He’s parading around the house under his big sister’s umbrella (yeah yeah, umbrellas in the house are bad luck, shut up) like it’s the greatest thing in the world, wearing one of his brother’s mittens. How often do you feel that utter joy about something small like that?
We can take some lessons from our toddlers. I have yet to see a truly stressed two-year-old, so what is it they’re doing right? And why do we give that up as we get older and grow up? Do we truly have to, or can we bring some of the magic of childhood into our adult lives? Here are six ways we can bring toddlerhood into our own lives to cut down on stress; start channeling your toddler today and notice the changes in your life!
1. Live in the moment. Toddlers have the attention span of a gnat and move seamlessly from one toddler-generated activity to another. Focus on what’s in right front of you right now rather than what’s ahead and you’ll find you move through your day more easily and with less stress.
2. Notice what’s around you. Ever take a walk with a two-year old? Everything is new, everything is interesting, and everything merits attention whether it’s ants on the sidewalk or a bulldozer across the street or a stick on the ground. Look around you with the eyes of a toddler, and notice the leaf-buds on the trees or the way the clouds are scudding across the sky, and rediscover the magic that’s all around you every day.
3. If you don’t like something, speak up. Toddlers don’t think twice about letting us know how they feel and they don’t feel obligated to hide their distaste for something, so why should we? Stuffing that away just leads to trouble down the road. Find a way to express your displeasure and speak up when something doesn’t feel right.
4. Say what you want. Conversely, toddlers have no trouble saying what they do want. If they see it, they want it! But often we get caught in a trap of feeling we can’t express what we want, because it’s not proper or we know we can’t have it anyway so why bother or we’re afraid to allow ourselves to deserve something we want. Finding out what we do want is a process; often it takes time to get the the heart of what we want, but allowing ourselves the freedom to want is a huge step.
5. Let people help you. Toddlers have no compunction in asking for help when they really need it, so why should we? Asking for help is something a lot of us struggle with for fear we’ll be seen as weak or less than capable. But asking for help when we truly need it is a form of surrender which can actually bring us closer to others. Let people in!
6. Every day is a new day. When toddlers wake up in the morning it’s as if it was the first time all over again. They don’t hold onto things from the day before. Why should we? Let it go. Start every day fresh.
Of course, the downside is that you may start craving Cheerios with your sippy cups of juice but just lay your head down on the mat and let it go. It’s all totally worth it. And after Quiet Time we’ll have a story!
Shhh….
April 2nd, 2008 at 10:14 pm
Great post! After a dreadful day with my teething toddler I really needed to be reminded of the up-side to our little tyrants, er, darlings. Yes, I love how they are so in the moment. I particularly love how they breathe so loudly when they are bent over, focusing on some new-found object or problem that needs solving. Awww.
April 2nd, 2008 at 11:42 pm
Ha! We did most of those things on an hour long walk (3 year old Thomas and I). Course, he then took a nap and I went to the gym - perhaps I should have napped with him!
April 3rd, 2008 at 8:46 am
Diane: oh yes, that intense mouth-breathing focusing ability is definitely something we could emulate. Maybe without the little drool drip though.
Karen: Aw, good on you for heading to the gym instead of a nap!
April 3rd, 2008 at 9:55 am
Great, great advice. Love it!
April 3rd, 2008 at 11:19 am
This was so completely inspiring!! I was so drained after chasing my 23 month old around this morning. This completely rejuvenated me! I think I will have Cheerios for lunch
April 3rd, 2008 at 3:33 pm
I am going to try to do more of this every day… it’s amazing what we adults discount, gloss over, or otherwise don’t see all around us! Thank you for the reminder!
April 4th, 2008 at 8:25 am
[...] of matches a post I read the other day, “Live Like a Toddler: Six Ways to Change Your Life,” from the “Catch Your Breath Blog.” Karen Murphy outlines six key concepts that [...]
April 4th, 2008 at 4:17 pm
Alicia: it’s amazing what one can pull out of their backside when bereft of ideas and exhausted from trying to work in the same room/house/universe as a toddler. I swear, we are BRILliant!
Gigi: Mmm, Cheerios….the cinnamon kind?
Lylah: Sometimes I think that if we hung onto 1/100th of the stuff we have as kids we’d all be geniuses. Though I am personally thankful my mom insisted on the whole potty-training thing with me. Some parts of toddlerhood should be left behind.
April 6th, 2008 at 7:30 am
These are so so true! I guess that’s why they say the first 5 years of a child’s life are so impressionable. We can be reminded of so much by being around our little ones! I’m sure you’re familiar with “Everything I Ever Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten”? I recall reading that for the first time many years ago and being “wowed” by it…. thanks for a wonderful post!
April 6th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
I have an 18m old (in addition to a 9 & 7 year old). Toddlers don’t have a care in the world and they see the world as if everything is new. We should strive to be like them.
April 14th, 2008 at 6:54 am
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May 7th, 2008 at 8:41 am
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