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Here’s my “sad” tale — I just traded the five-speed red BMW with the moon roof for a Honda CRV (it still has a moon roof, though).
I say things to my second-grade daughter like, “Because I said so.”
I like my sensible shoes.
Don’t get me wrong. I love my mother. But I fear I have fallen into the “I’ve Become My Mother” syndrome that I swore would never happen. And I’m scared.
Is it reversible?
Maybe retracing my steps into ‘becoming-my-mother-dom’ is one way to figure out how to reclaim a bit of my pre-mother self. Let’s see …
I’ve become too fond of my sweat pants — or as I prefer to call them, my “yoga pants.” That sounds so much more stylish, doesn’t it?
Complacency has set in about putting on even a little tinted moisturizer before I head out of the house in the morning. I admit that working from home doesn’t help motivate me — my PC doesn’t care if I’m wearing lip gloss or not.
And as I unwittingly jettison one aspect of my pre-motherhood life after another, I recognize less of my former going-to-the-office self and slip more into the stereotypical mommy role. OK, I haven’t gotten as far as June Cleaver, but you know it’s bad when the moms at school pick-up time comment that you’re all dressed up wearing a pair of black pants that aren’t stretchy and comfy!
While I am going to be driving the practical four-wheel drive vehicle for a while, I do still dream of finding bits of my former self — cute shoes, a sporty car, and more grown-up conversation.
Becoming my mother is a slippery slope. Time to start climbing back to the top of that hill.
This entry was posted on Thursday, December 20th, 2007 at 2:57 am and is filed under PunditMom Ponders.
Tags: Becoming my mother, motherhood, PunditMom
December 20th, 2007 at 6:46 pm
OH TOO TRUE!!! I grew up in a family where you had “school clothes” that you took off as soon as you got home. Now that I am at home right now, I found that I still have that same mentality with respect to “work clothes” - you don’t wear them at home. After my husband sat me down one day and asked me “what happened” to me since I have been at home, I realized, it’ s OK to look good at home - even if nobody sees you but your family. We dress up for everyone else, so why not if we are just hanging around them? Now, you won’t see me washing dishes in DKNY. But once the housework is done in my sweats, I get all dolled up, because I used to complain that I had all these “nice clothes” and make up, but no where to wear them. I have vowed NOT to LOOK like “somebody’s mommy” EVER again, but to look like ME!!! But I have found, once you decide you’re going to do something, you MUST self regulate - don’t let yourself “slide” just because it is a holiday….or the kids are painting, and you don’t wanna mess up your favorite…..You can do it!! AND YOU WILL!!!
December 20th, 2007 at 8:32 pm
Awareness is the first step, you know.
I know what you’re getting at, I think. As one gets surrounded by a lot of the stereotypical trappings of motherhood, it’s not unheard of to feel oneself BECOMING the stereotypical “mother,” and that may look a lot like our own mothers sometimes.
But yes, I think it’s reversible, if you want it to be, so good luck climbing back up the hill!
December 24th, 2007 at 1:50 am
My own mother was more likely to dress up for work than I am, even though we’re both teachers. I wear jeans at home a lot. I draw the line at leaving on my coffee-stained sweaters or sweatshirts.
February 19th, 2008 at 6:51 am
Its True!!!!