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I'm really tempted to take the puppies. (Edited)
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Business and friendship
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My husband and I have a rule, we never lend money to friends. Not that the issue arises very often, but the rule is in place for those rare times when it does. We will gladly give money to friends, but we never lend it. Sometimes friends will return money we’ve given them, and that’s wonderful, but it’s icing on the cake, because we have no expectations of ever seeing that money again.
In general I think the same rule applies to business and friendship (or family). They don’t mix well. It’s something that you’re better off avoiding, if you can. So what do you do when a friend becomes a client? I was approached by a friend the other day about doing some work for him. I have done some stuff for him in the past, when graphic design was a hobby, but now? I’ve got some misgivings. I know this situation is going to come up again, and I need to figure out how I’m going to approach it.
There are a lot of ways business and friendship can get messy:
- a friend assumes you’ll do work as a favor, free of charge
- you have a miscommunication about what work will be done
- the friend is slow to pay, and becomes offended when you remind them payment is due
- they expect you to give their cousin, neighbor, great aunt Fanny a job
- someone asks for a referral letter, but you can’t, in good conscience, recommend them
The list goes on. Although I don’t know how to avoid all the land mines in doing business with a friend, it seems like most of them can be avoided by being very clear about each person’s expectations, and meticulously spelling out every aspect of the business deal. Sometimes overkill can save your butt.
My primary concern is wondering if I should charge my friend what I charge everyone else. The idea makes me very uncomfortable. Heck, I’m uncomfortable telling strangers what I charge, let alone friends. Should I charge what I think he can afford? Frankly, it’s a little presumptuous of me to think I know all about his financial accounts. Should I charge what I think he thinks I should charge? Yes, right after I read his mind, I’ll use my powers of telekinesis to bend this teaspoon. Should I do it for free? That’s one option, although, you know, I am in business to make money.
How have you handled mixing business and friendship? And with what results? And what would you do , if you were in my shoes?
This entry was posted on Monday, August 20th, 2007 at 10:44 am and is filed under Where's The Owner's Manual?.
August 20th, 2007 at 2:27 pm
I would either do the work for free, do it for a barter, establish “friend prices” regardless (then, if they bitch at you, you can tell them that you are doing this far below what your bread and butter clients pay you, and they have to deal), or gently refer him to someone else.
I am lucky: I am a medical editor, so the fees I charge my clients are so far outside of what I would charge a person rather than a department that has grant funding, that I (like you) don’t feel comfortable telling people I know a) what I charge my clients and b) establishing a fee for *them.* So, if it’s a restaurant owner (has happened), I do the job for food. I have also done it for acting lessons!
I have one friend who pays me my low end fees because her work is close to what I do for my living.
But mostly, I do a lot of friend work for free (it usually doesn’t take me long), but in your case, I think I’d make a habit of referring friends elsewhere.
August 21st, 2007 at 1:03 am
Tough question!! I think it depends on the amount of work he wants done and what kind of friendship you have.
Maybe he will just offer to pay!
Won’t that be nice
Let me know how it turns out!
Talk to you soon,
Annemarie
August 21st, 2007 at 4:33 pm
I’ve taken on a friend as a client, once, and it worked very well. However, that was back in the early days of my business and my separation, when I was living half-a-paycheque from the foodbank, and could NOT turn down money. Period.
I wouldn’t do it now. The potential for icky-ness is too great, as you write. I survived working with my friend by being uber-business-like. When she was a client, she was a client.(In fact, I probably ended up cutting her less slack than I might someone else, so as to avoid the slippery slope of granting favours–> exploitation.) We had a contract, we stuck to it - and I explained this is the way it would have to be before I agreed to take her on.
She was fine with it. The only sticky moment I had was with her husband, and though I’m pretty sure I annoyed him, I can deal with it: she was my friend, not him…
All in all, I would say that if you can afford to turn down the money, you should.
August 21st, 2007 at 4:53 pm
I charge friends less than “non-friends”, but otherwise I’ve never really had a problem, though I do, as you say, make very clear beforehand, what exactly the job involves.
August 21st, 2007 at 4:53 pm
forgot to say, I also always do an invoice, no matter what, as it’s a record both for ME and for the my customer, friend or not (and it serves as a good reminder
August 21st, 2007 at 5:09 pm
This is a tough territory. You’ve got to be careful. I think it really depends on the nature of your friendship and amount of work that needs to be done. If it’s one of your closest friends - I would help out for free. If it’s somebody that is a friend, but not one of my really good buddies - i would just outline what they want me to do and share with them market rates. I would then simply put the ball in their court and ask them what would they think as “fair” price given our background. Hopefully it’ll be close to market
August 21st, 2007 at 11:27 pm
That is a sticky situation and you didn’t say if it was for his business or something personal he wants done.
If it’s for his business be it a company he works for or his home business it should be approached like any other customer. Let him know from the get go that this is how it will be handled, if he’s uncomfortable with it suggest another graphic designer for him to contact.
If he’s okay with it set up a meeting and go over every detail and set a schedule - all the normal stuff you would do, put together a proposal for him. Show him your regular rates and maybe offer him a certain percentage off this particular job.
Who knows, if things work out as they should tons of referrals could be coming your way!
August 22nd, 2007 at 12:48 am
Last year I opened a communications company with my two best friends and over the past few months, we’ve developed three basic ground rules:
1. Know your friends’ strengths and respect them.
2. Be as direct and open with each other as you can.
3. Laugh hard and laugh often!
We’ve also had clients who were family and/or friends. Sometimes it goes well and sometimes it doesn’t, but usually that’s due to really clear expectations set up front!
Good luck,
Danielle
Danielle@sweettalkpr.com/blog
August 22nd, 2007 at 2:30 pm
I have been on both sides of this picture. I have a 10% friend discount which works out nicely. I haven’t had any problems with this.
However, I hired my first programmer who was a very good friend and he did excellent work but did not meet deadlines because in his mind he was doing this for me as a friend. Keep in mind I did pay him so it became a problem and we had to part ways. Our friendship is still strong but it was very uncomfortable.
I think having a really good contract in place that goes over payments, time lines, etc. would help out alot so expectations are clear on both sides.
August 22nd, 2007 at 2:39 pm
Owning a storage unit business, I deal with this all the time. We have a couple who want to rent from us and I just know they are going to burn us even if we give them a deal on their unit. We have given our friends a ’special’ price to be nice but it does get sticky when they bring their relatives and want a good deal for them. We started this business to make a living and not to run a charity, this business is to buy grocerys for my kids, not because I am independently weathy.