lets face it: most women make the workplace suck!!!

Before you dismiss the rest of this article, please read on. It could very well be that the point being made here will help any female reader gain some needed insight into the workings of the male mind and visa-versa. You see, few males would ever demean a woman who has done well in her chosen career. Most of us enjoy a gal with some spunk.
One of this writer’s favorite movie scenes is from “Overboard,” starring Goldie Hawne and Kirk Russell. Her character joins him for a beer at a redneck bar. When she reaches for her drink, Russell’s character states that, “I’ve always been attracted to women who drink their beer straight from the bottle.” The point is that we men enjoy our women in all shapes and sizes and with all of your liberties as well, but we are absolutely turned off and disgusted when you feel that you can only relate to us with an “attitude.”
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Much like the gay male who overdoes his femininity with flamboyance, we view a female who is overly aggressive, manipulative, demeaning, and indignate in much the same way. There will never be any substitute for the expression true humanity, whether it is demonstrated by a man or a woman. Nothing is more attractive to a male than a liberated woman with a balanced attitude that is genuine and considerate.

I happen to work in an environment filled with young adults. Not only that, but I have two grown sons. If overly aggressive women could but hear the disgust for them as these young fellows talk, they would have to reconsider their self-deluded arrogance that demands they portray themselves as bitchy women. Except for whimps, there are few real men who really want anything to do with women who are self-gradiozed and demeaning toward men. These are the same women who revel in denigrating men for their supposed cluelessness. In truth, this issue has less to do with any difference between the sexes and much more to do with whether or not one is going to be a decent human being. I’ve had the experience of dating a woman who, although she was physically gorgeous, portrayed a superior attitude in all that she said and did. Her response to our four dates together resulted in an e-mail message stating that I was very “basic and simple” and that she was really looking for her “equal.” Even if I am basic and simple, the point is that she has obviously taken this attitude toward all men because that was most of the content of our conversations–her thirteen years of dating one “jerk” after another. However, I do think that she deserves her “equal.” After all, bitchy guys do exist as well.

Like my four-date-nightmare, there are too many women who complain about men not being romantic. The truth is that we guys are very capable of being romantic. It’s just that a woman with a self-centered attitude isn’t worth the effort on our part. Oh, we’ll go to bed with her as long as we can tolerate her barbs, griping, and whining but don’t think for one minute that we are going to ever get down on one knee and ask if she would like to wear our engagement ring. No, that request will be saved for a truly liberated woman–the one who is liberated from herself.
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In a perfect world, liberated women would be less aggressive and good men would be much more understanding regarding how to treat a woman more as a person than prey. Those couples who are enjoying a truly mutually fulfilling relationship are doing so because they have worked at developing balance, understanding each other, and relearning the simple truth that all of us need to be treated as valued human beings if we are to love truly and feel genuinely loved in return.

The world isn’t perfect but, then again, each of us has the ability to readjust our thinking so that we can bring both maturity and understanding to our own primary relationships.
Either that or we’ll just have to adapt to being unhappy and very much alone.
May every woman experience nothing but the right to be free in every way and do well in whatever they attempt to do with no man-made obstacles to have to confront along the way. That is your right and that is what your fore-mothers worked so hard to accomplish for you.

All I am saying here is that some of you are obviously making the mistake of becoming exactly what you have historically hated in men. Don’t be a bitch and if you are one, don’t blame it on men. Take responsibility for yourselves and be our friends, companions, counterparts, equals, lovers, and partners.

Okay, so you burned your bras and now you are liberated. Yes, you’ve gained many freedoms that were previously not acceptable for women. You can ask a man for a date and even be the one who proposes if you decide to do so. You can pursue your own careers and many of you have proven that you are quite capable of leading as well as following. You can drink beer straight from the bottle, go to male stripper shows, smoke cigars, and use any choice cuss word that you want; whereever you want.
You are indeed liberated. You’ve worked hard for it, you’ve earned it, and no one should deny you what countless generations of your gender have struggled and sacrificed to accomplish. However, none of this makes you necessarily attractive, desired, wanted, or pursued. In fact, should you be one of those women who is caught up in the current trend to act and be “bitchy,” doing so actually makes you very unattractive in the eyes of most men. Yes, you say that you can live without men who will not readily accept you should you have a bitchy attitude? Fine. Just realize that you’ve narrowed the field of men down to a very small minority. Furthermore, any willingness on their part to give in to a woman who feigns equality when really exercising control may be more out of their desparation than any kind of true acceptance.

Before you dismiss the rest of this article, please read on. It could very well be that the point being made here will help any female reader gain some needed insight into the workings of the male mind and visa-versa. You see, few males would ever demean a woman who has done well in her chosen career. Most of us enjoy a gal with some spunk.
One of this writer’s favorite movie scenes is from “Overboard,” starring Goldie Hawne and Kirk Russell. Her character joins him for a beer at a redneck bar. When she reaches for her drink, Russell’s character states that, “I’ve always been attracted to women who drink their beer straight from the bottle.” The point is that we men enjoy our women in all shapes and sizes and with all of your liberties as well, but we are absolutely turned off and disgusted when you feel that you can only relate to us with an “attitude.”
-
Much like the gay male who overdoes his femininity with flamboyance, we view a female who is overly aggressive, manipulative, demeaning, and indignate in much the same way. There will never be any substitute for the expression true humanity, whether it is demonstrated by a man or a woman. Nothing is more attractive to a male than a liberated woman with a balanced attitude that is genuine and considerate.
I happen to work in an environment filled with young adults. Not only that, but I have two grown sons. If overly aggressive women could but hear the disgust for them as these young fellows talk, they would have to reconsider their self-deluded arrogance that demands they portray themselves as bitchy women. Except for whimps, there are few real men who really want anything to do with women who are self-gradiozed and demeaning toward men.
These are the same women who revel in denigrating men for their supposed cluelessness. In truth, this issue has less to do with any difference between the sexes and much more to do with whether or not one is going to be a decent human being.
I’ve had the experience of dating a woman who, although she was physically gorgeous, portrayed a superior attitude in all that she said and did. Her response to our four dates together resulted in an e-mail message stating that I was very “basic and simple” and that she was really looking for her “equal.” Even if I am basic and simple, the point is that she has obviously taken this attitude toward all men because that was most of the content of our conversations–her thirteen years of dating one “jerk” after another. However, I do think that she deserves her “equal.” After all, bitchy guys do exist as well.
Like my four-date-nightmare, there are too many women who complain about men not being romantic. The truth is that we guys are very capable of being romantic. It’s just that a woman with a self-centered attitude isn’t worth the effort on our part. Oh, we’ll go to bed with her as long as we can tolerate her barbs, griping, and whining but don’t think for one minute that we are going to ever get down on one knee and ask if she would like to wear our engagement ring.
No, that request will be saved for a truly liberated woman–the one who is liberated from herself.
- -

In a perfect world, liberated women would be less aggressive and good men would be much more understanding regarding how to treat a woman more as a person than prey. Those couples who are enjoying a truly mutually fulfilling relationship are doing so because they have worked at developing balance, understanding each other, and relearning the simple truth that all of us need to be treated as valued human beings if we are to love truly and feel genuinely loved in return.
The world isn’t perfect but, then again, each of us has the ability to readjust our thinking so that we can bring both maturity and understanding to our own primary relationships.
Either that or we’ll just have to adapt to being unhappy and very much alone.
May every woman experience nothing but the right to be free in every way and do well in whatever they attempt to do with no man-made obstacles to have to confront along the way. That is your right and that is what your fore-mothers worked so hard to accomplish for you.
All I am saying here is that some of you are obviously making the mistake of becoming exactly what you have historically hated in men.
Don’t be a bitch and if you are one, don’t blame it on men. Take responsibility for yourselves and be our friends, companions, counterparts, equals, lovers, and partners.

But a sad obervation: the statement about successful women being a bitch is a statement I have heard the OVERWHELMING majority of the time from other women. In fact, last night I was at a work function and various business units within my company were being honored for outstanding performance. One of the business units that won several awards is led by a woman, and a female colleague seated next to me at dinner leaned over and said, “I hear she’s a real bitch - have you ever worked with her? So-and-so tells me she’s like a man dressed as a woman”.

It’s just one example and I hate to draw generalizations from it, but in that particular situation it was the other women in the office who saw me as bitchy, not the guys.

When I was a very young career woman, a wise lady told me I had to decide something: whether I wanted to be liked, or I wanted to be respected. It took me time to mature into it, but I definitely act based on respect. I want people to respect me, and I try to be respectful of others. Being a bitch has no connection to respect. Earning (and expecting) respect from others also involves treating others with respect, even if you are being assertive. I think people often forget that.

“Which is bullshit, of course.” LOL

An additional thought: I’m not suggesting that my co-workers ALWAYS like me. I’m sure at times they have uttered not-so-niceties about me under their breath. There are times when I think it is impossible NOT to piss someone off in the office. Whether that be my intent or not. That said, I think overall it is possible to get along exceptionally well with co-workers, be assertive and climb the corporate ladder.

Because they don’t allow themselves to assert themselves, they have no idea how to do it positively. I suspect they aspire to “nice, sweet, kind, gentle”, eating all manner of disappointment, untl they burst in a toxic blast of rage and fury. Which would only confirm their notion that you can’t be nicely assertive.

Which is bullshit, of course.