Single and Loving it - Too Much?
I have always heard the following advice.
- When you stop looking, you will finally meet Mr. Right.
have to become a complete person, and then you are ready for a healthy
relationship. (Instead of expecting another person to complete you.)
- Be content with where you are in life; be happy.
Now if you have been keeping up with my blog, you remember “It’s Ok to be Ok with Being Single.”
And I am not back stepping from that stand with this entry; because it
is ok to be ok with it. However, I want us to consider the possibility:
Can we become too happy with being single? Are we minimizing the value
of happily married couples and families with two “parents” acting as
role models in our society? There seems to be a fine line there that
Once I established that I was taking a break from dating “for a while,”
I began to explore the benefits of this decision. I can spend my
weekends with the kids away, any way I want to. I can watch whatever I
want to watch on TV. I can pick out the movies I see. I can decide
where to go eat. I can go to the store when I want, where I want, and
for how long I want…. and no one is bugging me that it’s time to leave.
I can have it all my way; and not feel a bit guilty about it!
you notice something reoccurring in that last paragraph? The pronoun,
'I' is repeated 15 times in that one paragraph! Fifteen times!
after enjoying this for a few weekends when the kids were away with
their dad it also dawned on me, that marriage was created for a reason,
had I forgotten? So with this epiphany, it came to my realization, that
yes we want to become content with our position in life at this moment.
This is my reality in which I can be happy; but I also do not want to undermine the notion that someday to be married again would also be a good thing.
that thought, I ask the question, what do I miss about being a married
couple? Here are a few things I came up with. (Do you have a list?
Please comment and let me know, what do you miss about being a married
- Snuggling at the end of a long day, recapping your stress points even if they don’t make a bit of sense to the other party.
- Early mornings waking up while the kids are still asleep and sharing pillow talk or (you can fill in the blank here ;)
- Spur of the moment family picnics, where both parent and stepparent assist with preparation.
- Having your spouse tuck you in and take care of you when you are sick.
- Getting a phone call – just to check in during the middle of your day.
- Having to check in with someone when traveling and you reach your destination; to let them know you are safe.
- The soft feel of a hand on your back or arm on your shoulder, to let you know the other is near.
- Love notes left in obscure places
- Inspiring adult conversations