Who are you? Really.
"How come when I'm round you that I feel happier then I've ever been & actually feel good about myself?". That was the easiest question I have ever been asked. My answer was "Because I get to know people for who they are in their heart not for who they think everyone wants them to be."
I have spent my entire life trying to be the person everyone expected me to be. I failed many times. I could never meet everyones expectations. I wasn't pretty enough, smart enough, good enough, rich enough. The list can go on forever. Where did it get me? Divorced, hurt, unhappy, disrespected & with no self confidence. Left to raise 2 boys alone.
After years of finding the wrong men that treated me badly I took a stand. After I walked away from an abusive relationship I said no more. I won't do that again. I will be treated with respect. That day I became me. I must say I do like myself a lot better now than I did 5 years ago.
It's been a tough road with family learning to like the new me. The me they should have liked all along. Pretending to be someone you are not is not being true to yourself or the people around you. It's easy to get scared that people won't like you if you are yourself.
Now I know your wondering where I'm going with this. Well I have learned that there are a lot of wonderful people out there that are so lost. Have you ever just watched people in a store? I was watching a lady one day. She was dressed in expensive clothing with the "I'm better than you" attitude. As she was shopping I watched her look around to see if anyone was looking before she looked at an item that someone in her lifestyle wouldn't get caught dead looking at, much less buy. How sad is that? She obviously really liked it. She put it back on the rack & moved on. You could see the look of disappointment on her face.
Sadly enough we have all been guilty of that.
When I meet someone I listen to what they say & how they say it. Then I ask questions that require them to answer from the heart. Nothing too personal though. That's how I get to know who they really are. I let them feel comfortable talking to me & before they know it they being are themself. I don't put on an act I just be myself. If we click great if we don't at least there is no question as to were they stand with me.
I use this in both personal & business relationships. It has kept me from getting involved with someone so wrong for me but it has also broke my heart. There is someone I am so deeply in love with but he just can't get past trying to be everything everyone wants him to be. I don't like that person much so we have gone our seperate ways. Sad for him because he is the most wonderful person I've ever met and yet he is so unhappy with his life. Good for me because I know I could never spend my life with him knowing he is being not true to himself or others.