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New baby vs 5 year old

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  • So I have a new baby and I took 8 weeks off. I pulled my daughter out of preschool so we could have some bonding time. It turned out to be pure hell. The 5 year old is very angry due to the changes. I'm constantly checking on her while I'm at work. I know it's due to changes but she is a terror. Any moms have any advice on how to handle an angry kid?
    Flag as inappropriate Posted by angela on 18th May 2007
  • I hope things are calming down for you now.



    I think the most important thing you can do is just continue to find time to spend with her one on one. I remember vividly that my 4 yo was very very angry (he is 13 now) when he had two younger brothers, and I just pulled him onto my lap and held him like a baby and looked into his eyes and said, "I know you are angry. I know we don't have as much time together as we used to. I miss it too. I miss you too. I love you more than anything. It's okay to be angry-- and I want you to be able to say that you are angry and know that this is okay. But there are ways that you don't get to behave." He started crying, I started crying, but it was better after that.



    Also? She may not necessarily know WHY she is angry-- but I'd try to get her to talk about it.
    Flag as inappropriate Posted by Jen Creer on 17th June 2007
  • Pulling her out of preschool may not have worked in your favour, since it threw off what she was used to, and made her more cranky in all likliehood.



    Are you able to get out and do "special" things with her, just the two of you? different ages, but I did that with my oldest when her sister arrived when she was 19 months. We STILL have "Mommy Time" every so often so she knows she'll have my full attention at some point. We all need that after all.



    Sounds like she just needs a little extra bit of reinforcement from mommy...



    Hope things are better now. It's hard enough with a new one around.
    Flag as inappropriate Posted by Thordora on 18th June 2007
  • I would have to agree with thordora, but I will say that I stayed home while I was pregnant, and I found that even if you are not changing a routine, this is a huge change and she will be mad, you have to make sure that she knows that you still love her, AND make sure that she knows that this behavior is not acceptable. You will have spurts of terror, so don't expect it to go away completely. But you just have to keep the rules straight. She is 5 and the baby is a baby, make sure she understands that. I have an 8 year old and a 3 year old, so i know how difficult this can be. Good luck to you, and stand your ground no matter what.
    Flag as inappropriate Posted by Michelle Anderson on 27th June 2007

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