My son (he's 18) just broke up with his girlfriend. I am not upset by this: I think it's appropriate. Adam is not ready for a significant relationship, and the young woman was. She was giving WAAAYYY more than she was receiving, in time, attention, encouragement, support...
I don't blame Adam for this. He's not tremendously mature for his age, but he's not immature, either. He's just an 18-year-old boy: he likes this young woman, yes, but his guy friends, his job, his online hacking about, his music are important to him - possibly more important than she is. Breaking up was the right thing to do because the relationship was unbalanced, and she was losing out.
It's probably easier on him, and it's better for her.
So, here's my dilemma. I want to have a woman-to-woman talk with her. I want to warn her off the (typically female) tendency to give too much. I want to tell her she deserves a certain minimum from a relationship, and should not blame herself when that minimum isn't achieved, or decide her needs were excessive when they aren't met. (Which I know happened in her relationship with my son.)
She and I have a friendly relationship. I don't see us continuing to have one when she's not in and out of the house any more, but I would like to have this one, woman-to-woman talk with her.
Sooo.... what do you think? Good idea or bad? (I am fully aware of the politics of not bad-mouthing my very own son, and the possibility of appearing to do so, even when that is not my intent. But really, I feel this girl is more at risk than my son.)