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The "no" stage

  • Our 15 month old has started the "no" stage. She says no to EVERYTHING. I've read that it's good to not say no to her as often in order to get her to say no less. I find it really difficult to limit the number of times I say "no". It just seems like it's a reflex and it comes out without me even thinking about it. Anyway, I'm actually not too frustrated about the whole thing (in fact it's kind of cute the way she walks around the house with her finger in the air chanting "No, No, No!";). I'm just wondering how you dealt with/are dealing with the "no" stage?
    Flag as inappropriate Posted by mamajama on 25th September 2008
  • I am so there! It's such an auto reaction to say NO NO. And, as you say, it's cute sometimes when they parrot it back to us. The challenge is that one night you'll lose your marbles because she won't listen to you--or worse, laugh at you--when you say "No, do not play with your nightlight when it is plugged into the wall." For us, no became a game and therefore became the downfall of our discipline strategy.

    I read that if you retrain yourself to say one phrase it's easier than trying to always have something different to say. My default is "Jack, where's your XXX? This could be where is your book, your nose, your ball, your doggie, anything that's reasonably findable (now that he's learning body parts, that's an easy one). This is especially effective if he's getting ready to do something instead of in the middle of, say, climbing on the coffee table.

    Good luck with your budding little rebel! :)
    Flag as inappropriate Posted by BrendaG on 26th September 2008
  • Oh, and I just got this article called st-no_11981.bc?scid=momstodd_20080923:3&pe=2U8Fudu ]Getting past "NO"[/url] from Babycenter (how do they know what I'm dealing with down to the week?)
    Flag as inappropriate Posted by BrendaG on 26th September 2008
  • I try to put a positive spin on every command. "Keep it on the table," "play with your toys," "be gentle," etc. I will also say "that's not for you," or "not today, maybe tomorrow." My kids haven't done the "no" thing so far. My elder uses it on her sister sometimes, but it hasn't gotten obnoxious. Maybe they have learned my trick, because instead of "no," I've been getting a lot of "I do it" lately.
    Flag as inappropriate Posted by SKL on 26th September 2008
  • My oldest son went through this about six months ago. NOT fun. But we just tried to give him options. The majority of the time, he was saying no because we were telling him something, "It`s time for bed, drink your milk" etc. So instead of giving commands (because really, who likes that anyway?!) we started offering an option. "Do you want Bear or Seal to sleep with you tonight?" "Which shirt do you want, red or blue?" It doesn`t always work, but most of the time he was so happy to have an opinion that he forgot to say no. Most of the time. :)
    Flag as inappropriate Posted by Genesis on 26th September 2008

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