Most favorite part is that I love being more then just a mom; I like using my brain and being smart and having more to my life then my house and family.
Had having children affecting your career path?
Yes, definitely. I haven’t pursued certain promotions because of different priorities. For example, I can’t have a long commute and pick up my son from school in time. So I have to prioritize and decide what’s important and what type of job parameters are not acceptable to me.
Did you find that your colleagues/clients treated you differently after you had kids?
My clients and colleagues tried to be understanding, but it’s hard if they don’t have kids. They can’t relate as much. When I first came back from maternity leave I worked with close friend of mine. Even though she supported me 100% she didn’t have kids and couldn’t grasp what I was going through. She tried, she just couldn’t. After a while our relationship was worn down.
In my last position our office was mostly female and our clients were men and most of them were dads with stay-at-home wives. After I had my child they looked at me in a funny way because I was working mom! That was weird. They couldn’t understand. I felt like they looked down at me because I was working.
I also found that a lot of women who worked with me, even if they were mothers, seemed to prioritize their jobs over their children - they would often work late and travel a lot. I had a hard time relating to them. It’s like there are two extremes out there. These women just couldn’t understand my challenge of balancing because their career was their life.
Who/what has been most helpful to you as you’ve navigated through your career as a mom? Where do you go for support/advice to help you?
I don’t have a good mentor/role model. It’s hard to find a mom and a career woman that I want to be. I belong to a private message board, an iVillage spin-off, for 3 years. This group is my biggest support group. It’s a mix of stay-at-home moms and working moms. It’s great to bounce ideas and problems off of them.