Answered on 13th October 2010:

Do you talk with her about what's happening? She's old enough to understand. And no matter your feelings about her dad, do you stay neutral and try to be upbeat? If she senses it upsets you then it will upset her. Do you ask her about what she does with her dad? Helping her connect fun things it could help; and if there's something really wrong it could help you figure out what that is. One mom I know discovered daddy's idea of family time was dropping their daughter at the home of the new girlfriend's mother, and leaving her there. He found himself back in court getting a lecture from the judge about the point of visistation! It may feel so close but sounds like it's a year and half before you'll deal with it; your daughter is going to do a LOT of maturing between now and then. Age two-and-a-half to three is when my daughter really started to develop her bond with her dad. Now she's eager for their visits. Also note that just because he gets 30 days consecutive; he might not want them; my daughter's dad gets two weeks of vacation with her; he has NEVER taken them. Likewise the alternating holidays? Yeah, he took Thanksgiving ONCE in six years. I think it was more about having his rights than doing anything with them.

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