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Elusive Balance

What do you really want?

by Kate  |  3601 views  |  3 comments  |        Rate this now! 

How many of us run around, day after day, doing all of the things that HAVE to be done for fear that the delicately stacked tower of life will come crashing down? In addition to the 40+ hour work day, laundry has to be done, bathrooms cleaned, kids bathed and food purchased and prepared. No wonder we are exhausted!

This weekend I took a step back and really took stock of my weekday/weekend time and how it is used and discovered a few things:
  • Baking rejuvenates the soul. Even when I am successful at work and make great strides, it just doesn’t compare to the perfectly baked cookie! (This time I made oatmeal cookies with dried cranberries instead of raisins! Yum!)
  • Working outside the home keeps me sane. Being able to have a structure that gets me out of the house and allows me to completely immerse myself into a different world makes me happy – even on the stressful days! (It helps that I enjoy those that I work with!)
  • On weekends, all I really want to do is spend time with my son and my husband. Together. All of us. Easier said than done with the number of errands that need to be completed in the 48 hour window. We are finding ways to make these trips fun and functional by combining the not so fun tasks with the more fun tasks: Get the oil changed and then go grocery shopping! (My son is a great grocery shopper and it’s one of my favorite things so this works for us!)
  • Alone time is underrated. We all need time alone with our thoughts and to just sit and breathe. It helps us sort through the craziness and acknowledge the great things! Craving this prompts me to go to bed earlier so I have at least 15 minutes to myself.
  • We need date night! My husband and I have only been out alone maybe 3 times since our son was born a year and a half ago. Even if it’s just watching tv or a movie together on the couch, we decided to make the effort to reconnect weekly instead of ‘later when we have more time’ (because it never happens)

Often we feel as though we are running from one thing to the next because we have to and not because we want to. There is a big difference! I want to go to work and enjoy my time there and the contributions I make. I want to go home and spend time with my family. I want my house clean and presentable for the next millionth campaign person to come knocking on my door unannounced. A lot of the time these wants can be in conflict, but when they come together and balance, it is a rare and beautiful thing!

3 comments so far...

  • You are so right! Shifting the focus to what you WANT - like "I want my house clean and presentable" - from "Ugh, I HAVE to clean my house" makes a big difference in my attitude. Plus keeping a focus on what one wants in life reminds me of how my Mom has always advocated "You run your life; don't let your life run you!"

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by Anne Florenzano on 19th December 2007

  • I love the tone of this article--being a working mom is tough, and we juggle a lot, but I think it's such a great reminder that often we juggle things we really do want to be juggling. (It doesn't necessarily make it easier, but I think having a positive attitude about it helps.)

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by Nataly on 7th November 2007

  • Love this! For the past few years my husband has been saying, 'do you have to or do you want to' every time I say 'i have to...' (yes, you'd think I'd have gotten it by now). Hearing this from someone else brings it all back home. Your outline for balance is a great one, Kate, and I'm looking forward to seeing what others say.

    I'm going to make a concerted effort to change my attitude, too. Especially right now when things are at their stress-iest. Perhaps that will make the balance a bit easier to deal with!

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by Mandy Nelson - Dandysound on 5th November 2007